


this autumn of ours

by d_fenestrate



Series: evergreen. [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Autumn, Bittersweet, Extended Metaphors, Introspection, M/M, Metaphors, Relationship Study, Soft Hinata Shouyou, Soft Kageyama Tobio, They care for each other so much, Third Year Hinata Shouyou, Third Year Hinata Shouyou and Kageyama Tobio, Third Year Kageyama Tobio, of sorts? we're studying an end, op loves autumn v much, so op wrote kghn as if they were autumn themselves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 05:00:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26910046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d_fenestrate/pseuds/d_fenestrate
Summary: The seasonal songs of decay bring forth crackles and crunches under unassuming footsteps as life passes by traces of destruction and death. Yet, they are welcoming, enticing onlookers to wander by and seek refuge within the disintegration.Hinata is not sure how much time has passed. He is not sure if time has passed at all.Leaves split and scrunch as paced footsteps near his way. Hinata sighs, falling further into his suspended dreamscape. There is a large sound of freshly fallen leaves crumbling next to him. And then there is once again silence— save for the song of autumn lulling him asleep again.“Oi, Hinata.”This voice so familiar beckons Hinata in similar ways that autumn beckons its lovers. Behind his eyelids, Hinata sees hints of blue and midnight clash and blend, its ambiance flowing through him with ease.alt; a grand metaphorical exploration of a nearing end for karasuno's freak duo
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Series: evergreen. [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2064327
Comments: 20
Kudos: 74





	this autumn of ours

**Author's Note:**

> hi hi hi! 
> 
> i've returned with more soft soft kghn but make it bittersweet, this time to the tune of my favorite season, autumn!!! somehow i managed to make what would've been 500 words max into 3000+. oh well, haha, i was trying something new and i had a lot of fun writing this! 
> 
> major thanks to @homeinbooks on twt and nae for looking over this piece <3 <3 <3 
> 
> also, it's 10/9!!!! happy hinakage day!!!!
> 
> hope you enjoy :D

One instant, the wind chills. 

One instant, the sun's rays warm. 

These instances lazily oscillate as the horizon gleams amber, colorfully dusting streaks of clouds across the sky as they meander on by, matching the lethargic pace of time tick-tocking away. 

Down on the surface of the Earth, nestled into a ground topped off with crusting, reddening and browning leaves, lies a tired Hinata Shoyo, flitting in and out of the waves of warmth and chills that autumn brings to him. 

It is relaxing. It is calming. 

His eyes are cracked open slightly as he observes the blurry images of autumn all around him. Crimson tones bleed into refreshing greens, vibrant scarlets crumbling to dulled, desaturated browns. The colors fall and coat the land, blanketing the world in warm monotone. 

Autumn is beautiful, elegant, and graceful in its own descent. The season rolls in and gently snuffs out the wildfire of summer as the fumes break off and dissipate into the gradually freezing atmosphere. 

Strangely, this is relaxing, calming. 

Hinata’s cheeks feel cold, his nose rosing at the tip, and yet the rest of his body is snug and warm, the thick material of his sweater trapping in his ever-blazing body heat. Lying down nestled into a heaping layer of leafs, his body falls apart peacefully, transcending him into bliss as the autumn air circulates around him, continuously prompting his senses to chase the warmth within. 

He barely recalls what he’s supposed to be doing. 

The seasonal songs of decay bring forth crackles and crunches under unassuming footsteps as life passes by traces of destruction and death. Yet, they are welcoming, enticing onlookers to wander by and seek refuge within the disintegration. 

Hinata is not sure how much time has passed. He is not sure if time has passed at all. 

Leaves split and scrunch as paced footsteps near his way. Hinata sighs, falling further into his suspended dreamscape. There is a large sound of freshly fallen leaves crumbling next to him. And then there is once again silence— save for the song of autumn lulling him asleep again. 

“Oi, Hinata.” 

This voice so familiar beckons Hinata in similar ways that autumn beckons its lovers. Behind his eyelids, Hinata sees hints of blue and midnight clash and blend, its ambiance flowing through him with ease. 

A sharp whistle cuts through the quiet symphony around, creating a cacophony of rustling and bustling leaves as they fly off of the surface, twirling in cold, cold air before sinking down to their new destinations, just centimeters away from their first. 

Hinata’s body shudders violently, the wind piercing through his layer of heat and diminishing any comfort previously present. He frowns as the shivers persist, the coolness of the dirt underneath creeping up slowly and encasing him from his back to his arms, dangerously nearing his heart. 

A hand lands on his chest, gentle and cautious as it sits perfectly on the spot untouched by the cold. Hinata’s body reacts instantly, flaring at the base of the palm and fanning out to the rest of his body as a new form of comfort and ease settles within him. Hinata draws back to the ground, titled ever so slightly in the direction of the recently-arrived onlooker nearby. 

The hand clutches at his sweater and shakes him softly. 

Hinata jerks and then whines, protesting at both the drowning drowsiness and surfacing wakefulness striking from within. 

“Shou,” the voice comes again, neither questioning nor demanding. 

The sound of the shortened form of his given name is intimate, fueling the minor, subdued fire within as it bristles calmly. Hinata stirs instantly and instinctively, his brows furrowing as he turns his head towards Kageyama, eyes yet to open. 

“What, Tobi?” He slurs the vowels of the other’s name together, tongue working against an unmoving mouth. 

There is a snort. Not out of amusement, but out of expectation, the sound most likely followed by the shake of a head. Hinata wouldn’t know, he hasn’t opened his eyes. 

“Wake up, dumbass. We have to study.” 

Hinata sighs. The leaves beneath him are comfortable, and, at the thought of studying, he remains unbothered. “Don’t wanna.”

Kageyama smacks his arm. There is no strength behind it. “You have to. We have Tokyo practices coming up.” 

Hinata whines again. 

“If I came here to make you practice volleyball, you would be up instantly.” 

“Of course.” 

“Don’t just say of—,” Kageyama cuts his outburst short and straightens out. “If we don’t do this, then we won’t be able to play volleyball against Nekoma next weekend.” 

Hinata curses at Kageyama in his head for being so reasonable when all he wants to do is unreasonably disappear under leaves and fall asleep. 

There is nothing but the chalky scents of fallen leaves around him as Hinata breathes in deep, sucking in cold, damp air that chills him right to his core. Kageyama’s hand has moved away, stealing the heat simmering underneath the touch. Hinata rises, partly to respond to his partner’s infuriating reasoning and partly to chase after the hand as the cold air hollows him from the inside out. 

Hinata’s eyes open and wince at his bright surroundings. It is still quite early in the evening, and the sun hangs high at an angle, illuminating the world underneath. 

Kageyama sits by Hinata’s side criss-crossed, his bag in his lap, a milk box in his hand. A brief memory of tossing his own bag haphazardly pops in his head as Hinata lethargically scans the ground, squinting as he looks for beige against brown. 

Body fully turned away from Kageyama, Hinata spots his satchel an arm and a half’s reach away. Huffing, he pushes off the ground and up, arms outstretched as he leans over smushed leaves for leverage. 

Kageyama’s hand returns, fisting at Hinata’s hood. His grip tightens as he holds Hinata in place with ease. Freezing instantly, the shorter turns around to glare weakly. 

“What now?” 

Kageyama tsks, now tugging at the other’s hood. The pull is sudden and Hinata’s eyes widen slightly as his body naturally responds to the call, following the guidance and landing ever so close to Kageyama, his back centimeters away from being in the other’s lap. 

“Oi, Ya—”

“There are leaves in your hair.” 

Hinata blinks. Ignoring the accelerating thumping in his chest, his hand floats to his head, pawing at the overgrown mane, pausing when crinkled, dried leaves lightly meet the soft, supple skin of his palm. 

“Oh?”

Hinata can feel Kageyama’s trademark pensive, stark gaze bore into the back of his head, just as he always feels it on the court, moments before either of them serve. Hinata pays it no attention. He tries shaking his head, causing only a single leaf to dislodge and fall. 

“That’s okay,” Hinata says. It really is. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s returned home with his long hair tangled and mangled around leaves and branches.

Kageyama does not agree. Hinata can feel this, and it causes him to hesitate from stepping up and out in the direction of his bag. 

“I’ll do it, dumbass, just sit still.” Hinata wants to ask what exactly Kageyama’s talking about when a minute touch to his hair strikes him up and alert. Kageyama leans in closer, nimble fingers working meticulously at the tangerine hair present in front of him. 

Kageyama has always had a knack for gripping Hinata’s hair, fingers threaded at the roots of a tight hold that is occasionally intimidating and other times lighthearted. But never has the other ever interacted with his hair as he is now. Thin fingers separate each strand carefully, disentangling the scraps of once living leaves and plucking them out only to throw them back with the flick of his wrist. 

Autumn circulates all around them. The vicious chill that tickles his insides has Hinata craving for Kageyama’s touch to come nearer. With each leaf removed, the touch nears and nears, never landing directly on his scalp. 

It is frustrating. 

It is infuriating. Suddenly the difference between the warm air and the chilled winds pulls Hinata apart, sending his head reeling as his frowns, shaking slightly. 

Hinata directs his aggravation elsewhere, mind wandering and landing dangerously far into a future where ends are nigh and new beginnings are imminent. 

The two of them are in their third year, nearing the end of their first term. Two more terms later, their time at Karasuno will come to a cessation, memorialized in the form of dark cylinders, buttoned up blazers, and tearful cheers. Just beyond this, another ending hides ominously near the termination of their high school career, remaining unacknowledged by all parties involved. 

Karasuno’s setter and number 10 will be a freak duo no more. There is an unspoken certainty that the two of them will not continue hand in hand immediately following Karasuno. 

Hinata feels a strand near the side of his head shift, Kageyama’s touch approaching the shell of his ear. As expected, there is no contact made. 

The cold deepens within. Hinata resists the shiver. 

They are somewhat similar to autumn, he muses. His eyes flit close as a baseline level of iciness subdues his functions, drawing him closer to slumber again. The small movements at the back of his head soothe, adding to the sensations dragging him down to drown in waves of sleep. 

They are autumn, Hinata thinks again, pulling at threads unrelated and tying them together. Here they are, Kageyama and Hinata, as third years, living life unacknowledging of the lasts they’ve started to gather, the ends they’ve started to tie, and the deaths of expectations they’ll never have again. 

They have had an extremely long summer full of fiery days as they roared like torrential thunderstorms on volleyball courts across the nation, leaving behind burns by their incessant strikes of lightning while they thundered in unison. They’ve braved smoldering temperatures that threatened fatality, narrowly dodging the consequences with a constant, forward-driven motion. 

And now, as their summer tiptoes to an end, they’ve entered their autumn, hanging on dearly to the wisps of warmth they can gather from the sun as it draws farther and farther away. Focused on a past season of heat waves, they remain unknowing of the advent of an equally long winter closing in on them as time tick-tocks by. 

There is another biting gale. And then a violent shudder. 

Oh. Hinata thinks bitterly. Their winter is near. 

A palm cups at the end of his shoulder, interrupting the catastrophic hurricane brewing in Hinata’s brain. The cold fog clears instantly as his body sears again, flames flaring out and roping around his core as the world brightens strangely with his eyes opening blearily—all ignited by the tender touch to his side. 

“Shou, turn around.” 

Hinata does so with no question, eyes half lidded, drowsiness lingering in his irises. Kageyama meets his gaze, expression blank with his eyes open and bright. Hinata hangs onto the blue against the backdrop of reds as Kageyama leans in again, hands heading straight for his forehead. 

Hinata frowns, confused. He doesn’t move away. 

“The wind blew some pieces into your bangs,” Kageyama answers. He continues to move. 

Autumn is juxtaposing. Comfortingly warm yet disconcertingly cold. It’s an emulsion of sensations that contradict while constraining you within, reminding of a home where safety might not be insured.

Nimble fingers grasp Hinata’s chin and pull his face downwards and to the side. Hinata doesn’t allow his gaze to tear away from the blue irises shining against the concentrated furrow on Kageyama’s forehead. His skin ignites, red flushing to his cheeks as cold fingertips move around his forehead to pick out leaves, leaving behind traces of flames. 

Their winter might just be right around the corner, patiently waiting to launch its season of dry, inescapable cold. But Hinata shouldn’t worry.

Not when Kageyama is capable of lighting him afire with so little as a gentle, caring touch. 

Blue remains bright and vibrant as Hinata swims in it. 

They will survive, he believes. They will survive the cold and make it to the end where a new year awaits them, welcoming the duo with the blooming of a graceful, fruitful spring. 

Hinata relaxes. His fire kindles. Crackles. Surges alight at each touch Kageyama places on him. 

Eyes traveling downward, he can’t help but notice all that has changed whilst remaining the same. Hinata is much bigger now, compared to when he had walked his first steps on the Karasuno grounds. Kageyama is the same, no longer just simply a young, talented setter, but now a renowned high school volleyball player. 

They have both changed immensely, and yet Hinata still fits perfectly within Kageyama, snugly slotted into the shapes the other makes for him to fill. Kageyama is just the same, drawn towards and around Hinata’s ever changing energy, locked perfectly in place. 

They fit. They just do. Hinata hopes they will fit together in the future too. 

A leaf falls into Hinata ’s eye and he winces. Kageyama curses and a soft hand cups his cheek to bring him back, the pad of the setter’s thumb swiping underneath Hinata’s eyes ever so gently. 

Heat flares under Hinata’s skin as Kageyama’s frigid fingers touch, raising the fever within Hinata higher and higher and higher, driving him insane as he warms up to meet the gentle chill that envelopes him lovingly. 

This is autumn. Hinata can’t explain. It just is. 

Suddenly, Kageyama moves away and Hinata has to suppress the urge to follow forward. 

“All done,” is the other’s curt explanation at Hinata’s perplexed expression. Overtaken by the loss of their proximity, Hinata hovers in place, reading the blank yet awaiting face staring back at him, patient as ever behind the brash exterior. 

The atmosphere is now serene. The winds caressing their exposed skin as currents circulate leisurely, allowing rays to temporarily warm over the land. Bright colors strike and glimmer in descending light. The oscillation between two opposing forces ceases, bringing forth the semblance of a toasted standstill. 

All comes to a pause. And Hinata chases home. 

Autumn tastes like Kageyama’s lips on his own, bitter and singed at the edges, a burn so prevalent it takes over the entire palette, overwhelming the sweet desires that reside behind. It is the taste of a charred love that blazed through an endless summer, flying too and too close to perilous flashes and flames. 

Kageyama responds with no resistance, making room for Hinata as he always has, matching his partner’s desperation with a soothing press forward, warm palms grasping tense arms as the chill of autumn envelops the two, entrapping their heat within. 

“Tobi,” Hianta says into the kiss, voice hushed. “We have to study.” 

Kageyama hums, grip tightening. “You started this, not me.” 

Hinata frowns and tries to draw back weakly. It doesn’t work and he murmurs into the persisting kiss. “Okay, then let me go.”

“Don’t wanna,” says Kageyama, marginally pulling back and childishly mimicking Hinata’s earlier protests. 

Hinata holds a steady glare, eyes crossing as he locks on to Kageyama’s amusement, a loving form of irritation crawling up his spine. “You have to. I do too. Tokyo practices are coming up.” 

Kageyama smirks and tugs at Hinata, bemused as Hinata leans in despite his words. 

“If I asked you to practice volleyball with me,” Hinata speaks into soft, nudging lips. “You would right away.”

“Of course,” mutters Kageyama, cutting Hinata’s next response off with another tender kiss. The wind whistles and leaves dance around them, reds burnishing in the sunlight. 

Hinata pushes off after a few moments. “Okay but if we don’t do this, then we won’t be able to play volleyball against Nekoma next weekend,” he attempts to explain, hands gripping tightly onto Kageyama’s shoulders. He is so close to Kageyama that the heat within is overwhelming. 

His words are weightless. Even if Hinata so desired, he wouldn’t be able to detach from the bubble of comforting warmth created between the two of them, locking them in as it protects from the hints of their impending winter hanging drily in the air. 

“Go get your bag,” Kageyama instructs, hands reluctantly peeling away. Hinata shivers immediately. He briefly wavers, wondering if Kageyama would hold him once again. 

When Kageyama doesn’t, he turns with a sigh and bounds forward to grip the nearest part of his bag, speeding back into Kageyama the minute he’s acquired the desired object. Hinata’s shoulder collides against the other’s chest as he clumsily stumbles around sitting by Kageyama’s side and leaning into the other, chasing the contact that keeps his fire alive. 

Their bubble mends its temporary tear. Autumn dances around them, fluctuating and dynamic, as pages are turned with difficulty, confusion and frustration never separating the two as they yell and glare at their academic material. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Hinata is burning despite simultaneously shivering. His eyes crack open to see the sky darkened with drifting clouds dulled and shadowed as they block starlight. 

Disoriented, Hinata tries to ground himself and latch onto the sensation of the breaths against his neck. The seeping cold he feels can be rooted to the sharp drop in temperature at the absence of the sun in the sky. The striking heat can be rooted to the setter wrapped around his side, head nuzzled into the crook of Hinata’s neck, hair tickling the underside of his chin as the wind continues to blow lazily and deeply into the night. 

Huh, Hinata thinks, blinking as clarity rushes to his head. Mindlessly, he toys with the ends of Kageyama’s hair. 

They fell asleep, Hinata realizes. 

They didn’t study, he realizes more. 

And there are leaves in his hair again, he realizes finally, an exasperated groan caught in the back of his throat. 

Twilight shines down on tangled knots of limbs as Hinata shifts and attempts to draw away. Kageyama grips and curls with each of Hinata’s movements, unknowingly chasing after the heat of Hinata’s kindled fire just as the other had done to his touches before. His brows furrow instantly when the shorter resists and Hinata simply watches as Kageyama’s cheeks heat and redden. 

Weak and just as desiring of the other, Hinata plops back down onto his flattened bed of leaflets, the trapped iciness in the ground resting stagnantly against his back. His eyes fixate onto the midnight sky. 

Night falls earlier with the turn of autumn. Darkness falls preemptively, contrasting the remaining touches of summer from during the day. The hours have yet to grow and dark will persist more and more, expanding its stay as winter nears. 

They might become shadowed. They might dullen. Hinata worries not. The sun will return again, overwhelming the dry darkness left behind with stronger rays that nourish the ground alive again, donning a fresh blanket of blooming grasses and vibrant, lively petals. 

Their newfound spring is just as near as their inevitable winter. To make it that far, Hinata thinks, all they have got to do is survive. 

To his right, the moon shines beautifully, elegant and graceful, as its rays shine and scarcely illuminate, bringing no warmth to the surface. This, Hinata thinks, is another form of comfort, a constant return that reassures and guides the night through its mystical ambivalence. 

Day or night, summer or winter, they will be okay. Hinata has always known. 

They will be fine. 

“Tobio,” He whispers as he shakes and pats the other awake. “We’re going to have to ask Tsukishima to tutor us again.” 

Kageyama groans, burrowing his face further into Hinata. “No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

He looks up with a sleepy glare. “I’m not asking that asshole for anything.”

Hinata rolls his eyes. “Yes, we are. We always have to ask him, it’s not new.”

“Still don’t wanna.” 

“Too bad, Tobi. We have volleyball to play next weekend.” 

It is the mention of volleyball that rustles Kageyama, prompting a frown and a tsk. Struggling immediately, the setter peels himself away from Hinata, sitting up, the ends of his hair stick out at odd ends while his spine stretches as a yawn suddenly erupts. 

Hinata bites his lip partly at the bubbling amusement at Kageyama’s disheveled state and partly at the cold that strikes and bites at him viciously. 

They have to simply survive. They have to simply to enjoy the distinct decaying beauty of a vibrant season that dulls as the days roll by, pleasantly paying no attention to the lazy battle between summer and winter within its atmosphere with the warmth gradually losing. 

Winter will inescapably come. Winter will inevitably pass. 

Hinata should not fear. 

For him and Kageyama, their brazen high school love is preparing for an extended hibernation as time tick tocks by. But beyond and right around the corner of a looming, terrifying wintered hiatus is a brilliant, radiant spring waiting in giddy anticipation for a reunion worthy of an immortal blazing summer of love.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> i hope you enjoyed this :)  
> if you want to retweet, [here's the twitter promo tweet for this fic!](https://twitter.com/d_fenestrate/status/1340900402976448513)  
> i'm often screaming about hinata and kghn on my [twitter](http://twitter.com/d_fenestrate)! i'm on [tumblr](http://de-sociate.tumblr.com) too haha.   
>   
> 


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